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My Mid Mid-life Crisis

Everybody has heard of the mid-life crisis. Usually typified by a balding married man trying to cling on to his lost youth by purchasing a red convertable sports car. While I am not quite to that point just yet, I have been struggling with something similar and just as sad and pathetic. My mid mid-life crisis.
Soon after my 27th birthday I realized how close to the age of 30 I was. Much closer to 30 than to 18. Which is odd because I feel much more like a troubled teenager than a responsible contributing member of society. Being in your mid 20’s is an exciting time, but it can also be terrifying. Many of your friends start getting married and having kids, while I still enjoy playing beer pong and going to heavy metal concerts. Every holiday get-together with the extended family is a sure let down. “Hey Dustin how is everything?” “Still working the same job? Still haven’t gotten back into school? How’s your girlfriend? Aww, you broke up?” Everyone in the generation before me has the ideal timeline of life all figured out. Once you finish high school then you go to college. Then you get a successful career. Then you get married and have kids. Then you buy the house with the white picket fence. I seem to be a few years behind on this life-plan. Apparently my biological clock is ticking. Life is short, and there are still many things I have left to accomplish. There are also many things I personally need to overcome myself before I start thinking about starting a family. I like the freedom of being able to pick up and go anywhere at the drop of a hat if I wish to do so. Yet I can already see my once youthful good looks being ravaged by time, so i feel the urgency to find a mate before my options become limited to carnies and mail order brides. So if you’re a girl who digs conflicted guys in their late 20’s that live with their parents, and don’t mind if their boyfriend wakes up one day wanting to move to New Zealand with or without you, drop me a line.

Published inDustin