While perusing the Aegean coast off the west coast of Turkey, I had this most interesting dream. The night before was mellow and filled with exotic foods which might have helped this to happen. Upon waking up I immediately had to write it down as it was too strange to forget and I had to make this blog as I think it might be a crucial insight into my psyche. I woke up with Charlie’s alarm and was not ready to have the dream finish but maybe it was for the better…The dream began in a school setting which reminded me of an elementary school back in Simi Valley but I could not say exactly which one. I was the “new kid” at school and seemed to be quite the celebrity. Everybody liked me and wanted to talk to me. As I ate lunch, I helped the nerds beat up the bullies and the girls all swooned at me. Then I was asked to join everybody else in a game of 75 insults towards the faculty. This game consisted of two lines lining up and facing each other, and one by one some body would run into the middle and insult the faculty. On the way to my spot in line for the game I ran into my buddy XXXX (lets call him Al), a friend I have from the UCI soccer team but haven’t seen in ages. But I know why he was in the dream and I must digress to get this short but telling story out there…
While stretching one early morning on the Crawford fields, Al tells me this story of him and his girl friend from the night before. We practiced twice a day until at least 8pm so it was impressive he was able to get all this done. Al and his girlfriend were having sex on the couch in her parents house in the living room. As some people like to do, they then started having butt sex. This went on for a few minutes but then all of a sudden the girlfriends parents came home unexpectedly and opened the door to this most interesting scene that any parent would love to catch their daughter in. Al reacts quickly and pulls out but he pulls out too quickly and the first 5 inches inside his girlfriends colon also came out much like you might expect if you put your hand inside an inside-out sock and pulling to make it right-side-out. Now lets try and paint the scene… Al is standing naked in front of the parents and his girlfriend with poop stains on his member and his arms out to the side with shoulders shrugged as if to say “WOW, who would have thought this could ever happen, I am truly sorry”. The parents were in shock and not saying a word, and the girlfriend was screaming in pain with her ass in the air because she is unable to hide the new tail she has been given. So the story ends with Al going to the hospital with the parents and the girlfriend. The girlfriend is draped over the back seat as she cannot leave the doggy style position. Al is forced to deal with doctors and family friends trying to explain what happened over and over.
But this was not in MY dream and let me get back to the interesting stuff of my dream. The insult game goes on for a while but I cannot remember any of the insults. The only thing I remember is a guy getting into the middle and stuttering really badly trying to insult the principle but everyone just started laughing at him.
After this I get on my very fast GSXR and drive back to Simi. I know I said the school was like that of one in Simi but it seemed to be in Orange County. So I rode back and forth to Simi several times, aparently because I had school in OC and my life in Simi. The rides were done at break neck speed with all caution to the wind but no problems ever were encountered during the transits.
Finally I go to my friend Pratt’s house but park my bike inside the neighbors house. This neighbors house I believe to be the brother of a friend I have but this brother I never knew or talked to or even knew his name. Strange. I remove my bike and goto Pratt’s real house. I see Pratt making some kind of weird green liquid with a very impressive chemistry set with the glass tubes with swirls and all sorts. This green liquid you could paste onto peoples bodies and then touch it and it would electrocute them in a very hilarious way and not leave any lasting marks, I think.
I went to the back of his house and am told to open this cage which I remember struggling to open. Once I open it the whole area fills up with prison looking people and the whole place looked to be a prison. There were guards harassing a black midget. The black midget suddenly, and with great strength, punches one of the guards and sends him sprawling against the wall and then he does the same to the other two guards. Now everybody is basically trying to capture this black midget but he has the strength of many men and is very wily as midgets can be. I remember running all around trying to stay away from the fight and the fight was never to involve me. Finally a friend pulls me out and drags me to a back room that had 3 bunk beds in it.
At this point I am watching myself from a third persons perspective. I am laying on one of the beds on my side with my face down. I watch someone take a hand drill, the kind you spin yourself and make a large gash in the side of my abdomen. I then watch this guy take some sort of wiggly thing and place it on my back. It goes into the wound and I can see an image, as if it is an x-ray screen, of it going inside my body and absorbing much of my blood while I listen to a narrative of how this thing is going to make me more fight ready and able to handle any sort of pain and torture and it is to help me. I then am looking at my body from the outside again and I watch a pool of neon green/red blood cover my body and bed but it then gathers itself and goes back into my body very much like you could imagine slime moving around like in teenage mutant ninja turtles.
While this is all going on, the guy opens a box which he says contains a thalamus gland. He says this is to keep the pain away. The thalamus gland jumps out of the box and starts to pleasure me. (I know, weird)
Eventually I get up from this “torture” and am shown 5 rolling clear balls about the size of a large marble. I have control over these balls and can make them split and merge and morph. Then they turn into about 20 very ornately decorated figures and animals which I cannot remember exactly what they were. The one I do remember was a very nice looking polar bear with all sorts of sparkly decorations and colors on it which I was told would turn into a robot in a few days and I would have to wait until then.
Then I woke up. Any analyses?