I first experienced cigarettes in sixth grade. I sneaked out my parents’ house in the middle of the night to go TP’ing with a friend. Some older neighborhood kids were sitting under a streetlight blowing giant plumes of smoke into the still night air. They had long greasy hair, baggy jeans, and absurdly long belts hanging past their knees. If one of them pulled out a switchblade and told us to take a hit, it would’ve been exactly as I imagined from all the PSA’s. But they didn’t. My friend came over and asked for one. They handed him a Marlboro Red 100 – the kind you only see in bowling alley bars and Keno lounges. He held the thing with all five fingers and smoked it like a fine Cuban cigar – then he threw up on the curb and never smoked again. I wasn’t so lucky. Continue reading The Time I Quit Smoking
The morning of September 11, 2001, I awoke excited. I was buying my new car that day, a ten-year-old Volvo, all black with leather seats and an aftermarket spoiler I couldn’t wait to remove.
I’d spent the previous months backing out on the concept of college after graduating high school because 18-year-old me placed . . . → Read More: McNever Forget
Lay awake in bed from 3AM till 7AM and you finally say whatever screw it and start the day. Â No aid or detriment of drugs to blame here just biochemistry, mental over stimulation, Circadian rhythms — what a mystery. Â Morning smells like morning where you are and everywhere it’ll smell this way. Â Good. Â Crisp . . . → Read More: Double Day
A handy dandy list for living in the greatest country on Earth.
- DO marry a 16-year-old if you’re 50. – DON’T marry a consenting adult of your same gender.
- DO separate church and state. – DON’T actually separate church and state.
- DO drink alcohol and throw a table through the window. . . . → Read More: The Dos and Don’ts of America
The Falling Man
So much happened so fast.
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â
In the midst of the atomic age, JFK challenged the nation to put a man on the moon, and within a decade, the space program did. The moon landing . . . → Read More: The Falling Man
She winked at me. I average about eight of these per year, none worth following up – except this one. She was a skinny 27-year-old blonde who wrote at the bottom of her page “If I dig your profile and you dig mine, let’s cut the bs and just meet up. I don’t need another pen pal.” I said I dug her profile, and we agreed to meet for lunch that Sunday.
Continue reading Another Match.com Failure
It was Saturday night going on Sunday and the streets of Williamsburg were crackling with rain and laughter.Â I was in a fourth floor apartment by myself watching the second half of Can’t Hardly Wait on HBO.Â I recently turned 27 and this is how things are now .
For people of similar age, . . . → Read More: Can’t Hardly Wait
Twenty-two miles off the coast of Southern California lays a hidden gem in America: Catalina Island. Technically it’s part of California, but anyone who’s ever experienced it will tell you otherwise. Known for its big city, Avalon, most people overlook the quaint island village of Two Harbors. It has only one restaurant, one bar, . . . → Read More: The Disturbing Yacht Story
Ladies, and some exceptional gentleman, I recently fulfilled a childhood dream. Are you sitting down?
I picked wild flowers, fashioned them into a crown and frolicked in the countryside on a midsummer’s day; exactly like a storybook princess.
Now that you’ve stopped weeping gleefully, here’s what happened.
Once upon a time, I studied abroad . . . → Read More: A Midsummer Night’s Dream Come True
Due to my mom’s hatred for wild and ruthless confrontation, she never exposed me to the toothless sport of hockey.Â The one time I attempted to watch it, I experienced so much trouble following the puck on our 32” rounded screen TV, I gave up instantly and turned on another competitive activity, Iron Chef.
. . . → Read More: One Girl, One Cup