The Dos and Don’ts of America

A handy dandy list for living in the greatest country on Earth.

- DO marry a 16-year-old if you’re 50. – DON’T marry a consenting adult of your same gender.

- DO separate church and state. – DON’T actually separate church and state.

- DO drink alcohol and throw a table through the window. . . . → Read More: The Dos and Don’ts of America

The Falling Man

AAA -- Falling Man

The Falling Man

So much happened so fast.

                                

In the midst of the atomic age, JFK challenged the nation to put a man on the moon, and within a decade, the space program did. The moon landing . . . → Read More: The Falling Man

Another Match.com Failure

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She winked at me. I average about eight of these per year, none worth following up – except this one. She was a skinny 27-year-old blonde who wrote at the bottom of her page “If I dig your profile and you dig mine, let’s cut the bs and just meet up. I don’t need another pen pal.” I said I dug her profile, and we agreed to meet for lunch that Sunday.

Continue reading Another Match.com Failure

Can’t Hardly Wait

chw - dexter

It was Saturday night going on Sunday and the streets of Williamsburg were crackling with rain and laughter.  I was in a fourth floor apartment by myself watching the second half of Can’t Hardly Wait on HBO.  I recently turned 27 and this is how things are now [1].

For people of similar age, . . . → Read More: Can’t Hardly Wait

The Disturbing Yacht Story

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Twenty-two miles off the coast of Southern California lays a hidden gem in America: Catalina Island. Technically it’s part of California, but anyone who’s ever experienced it will tell you otherwise. Known for its big city, Avalon, most people overlook the quaint island village of Two Harbors. It has only one restaurant, one bar, . . . → Read More: The Disturbing Yacht Story

A Midsummer Night’s Dream Come True

Ladies, and some exceptional gentleman, I recently fulfilled a childhood dream. Are you sitting down?

I picked wild flowers, fashioned them into a crown and frolicked in the countryside on a midsummer’s day; exactly like a storybook princess.

Now that you’ve stopped weeping gleefully, here’s what happened.

Once upon a time, I studied abroad . . . → Read More: A Midsummer Night’s Dream Come True

One Girl, One Cup

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Due to my mom’s hatred for wild and ruthless confrontation, she never exposed me to the toothless sport of hockey.  The one time I attempted to watch it, I experienced so much trouble following the puck on our 32” rounded screen TV, I gave up instantly and turned on another competitive activity, Iron Chef.

. . . → Read More: One Girl, One Cup

Once Upon a Dangerous Mind

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Little Danielle

My rocket scientist father and my social worker mother produced me, a rocket brain social idiot.  People could blame it on “middle child” syndrome or the fact that I ride on the cusp of Leo/Virgo, but judging on predisposed factors isn’t fair, right?  Until a quick Google search . . . → Read More: Once Upon a Dangerous Mind

Wayne Worlds Collide

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WAYNE WORLDS COLLIDE

A)n outline to an essay I started, originally titled “WAYNE WORLDS COLLIDE… The Hipster Economy of Cool and its effects on/interplay with American neo-capitalism (post Regan) as demonstrated in feature film Wayne’s World and its sequel.”

B)y mattz brog

[begun july 1st, 2011, 9:19 PM , abandoned july 2nd, 2011, 1:43 . . . → Read More: Wayne Worlds Collide

Til Death Do I Part…

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Four of my friends planned their owns deaths. Two of which acted as my mentors, encouraging me to be the best I can be, to follow my dreams and to live to my fullest potential.  The irony alone could kill me.

The certainty of death has slapped me across the face and the gross . . . → Read More: Til Death Do I Part…

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The Senior Editor

Pat
Stoic ... yes. Shrewd ... yes. Worryingly intelligent ... yes. Hates big word counts ... yes. Mysteriously curly haired ... yes. He is Pat, the most interesting editor in the world.