Six years had passed since my break-out Havasu spring break of 2003. If you were to ask my close friends when I “started being sleazy,”…
Everything and the The Bathroom Sink
Month: February 2011
Last year, my blood-brother Watty and I were discussing the layered indictment of free trade and class structure in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.…
The night I returned from Utah after my disastrous experience with Kenzie, I invited Nancy, 28, over for a “hang out.” I’d been seeing…
I’ve decided to jump back into the world of online dating. I joined Match.com in hopes of finding the perfect : fun loving, adventurous, down to earth, easy going, outgoing, passionate about music, loves to go out but also enjoys staying in, sassy and smart, new-to-this-whole-online-dating-thing-and-still-thinks-it-weird-but-thought-she’d-give-it-a-try girl. I chose Match.com over some of the free alternatives like Plenty of Fish because I appreciate the commitment it takes to give out your credit card information and spend 25 bucks a month to find love.
(As you might guess I’ve been terrorizing the online dating world for some time, but I wrote this one a couple years ago after my…
May we please skip the first kiss? I’m awkward. Yesterday, I tried teaching my sister table etiquette while at an upscale dinner fundraiser with Los…
I met Christine at a bar. She had an MFA in journalism, and was currently interning for Rolling stone. She said Lady Gaga was “a…
A couple years back, my struggling buddy Napolean began getting all into pick-up literature. His methods with women weren’t rendering any results, so he hit…
It’s a cold world for a bachelor. Nothing makes sense. Our expectations have been spoiled by cinema and literature. We’re a bunch of apes living…
It can be a cold and heartless world out there. Filled with degenerates stealing your bicycles and looting your coffers as you scrape and scrounge…